My Subconscious Speaks

“I should not have given him so much insulin “

Since my husband has returned home I have had the same dream...As soon as I close my eyes and doze off I dream that I back my car into something. Every night. It's been almost a week and it scares me. First because we had the accident in February in which we were rear ended. And lastly because I always feel the impact and it jolts me out of my sleep.

I used to dream that I fell off a building and hit the ground hard, every night for years. It was so much a part of my routine that my husband didn't tell me good night until I jumped from the impact. Then one of my team members told me that it meant that I felt that I was not in control of my life. I adjusted my life, went back to school and finished my MBA.

Well I looked up what a dream about me rear ending a car signifies and it means that I have a level of guilt or the fear of causing someone harm.

I am disarmed when my subconscious mind speaks loudly to my soul. It shocks me into reality. I am not in control of me. My subconscious mind doesn't allow me to hide and bury what I really feel and think.

I am afraid that I caused my husband to get sick this last time and it scares me that I may cause him greater harm in the future. 😞 exhale. I am going to keep praying and practicing being a better caregiver 🙏🏾