I will not be emotionally avoidant during this chapter of my life. I will deal with my changes in emotions as they come.

It may seem as though I am depressed or always sad. I am not. Even going through this heartbreaking experience, I choose to smile and be positive. I sometimes share how I am really feeling or tell people I can't talk about it at that moment. I choose to consciously acknowledge and accept my sadness and pain. I also choose to consciously stay positive and hopeful through this journey.

I know we will all pass away one day. I know my husband fought a good fight. I know this new life is difficult for me to adjust to. I also know that my husband would not want me to be perpetually sad and depressed. I know that he tried his best to prepare me for the "things" that would happen, even though he could never prepare my heart for this 💔 loss. I know bad times don’t last always. I know that even as I weep I find joy in other people and things. Everyday I miss him. But everyday I smile and choose happiness inspite of it.

The first step to healing is releasing the pain…I am still here, but I am faithfully moving forward.